The Misery Survey

Preliminary Results

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An early snapshot

These results reflect responses received through August 14, 2026. The sample is still very small, so the findings below are descriptive rather than representative. This page will evolve as more people participate.

Who has responded

Demographic snapshot

n = 3 completed responses
34–62 Age range Ages reported: 34, 58, and 62
3 Identified as men All three demographic respondents
2 + 1 Relationship status Two partnered; one single
Questions 137 and 138

How forms of misery rank

n = 2 completed rankings

Participants ranked 13 forms of misery. The figures show the average rank, where 1 is highest. Longer bars indicate a higher average placement. With only two complete rankings, differences should not be treated as established patterns.

Most frequently experienced

  1. Guilt3.0
  2. Regret4.5
  3. Rejection4.5
  4. Shame4.5
  5. Grief5.5
  6. Loneliness6.0
  7. Jealousy6.5
  8. Anxiety7.0
  9. Envy7.0
  10. Corrosive anger10.0
  11. Boredom10.0
  12. Depression10.5
  13. Waiting12.0

Most intensely experienced

  1. Rejection3.5
  2. Jealousy4.5
  3. Shame5.0
  4. Guilt6.5
  5. Anxiety7.0
  6. Loneliness7.0
  7. Corrosive anger7.5
  8. Envy7.5
  9. Regret7.5
  10. Depression8.0
  11. Grief8.0
  12. Boredom9.5
  13. Waiting9.5
In respondents' own experiences

Early qualitative themes

2 open-ended contributors
01

Loss can reveal the value of connection

One account of grief described recognizing the importance and fragility of a friendship only after the friend's death.

02

Competence can become tied to self-worth

One respondent connected anxiety to a long-standing need to be capable, reliable, and needed—and to the difficulty of ever stopping the effort to prove it.

03

Perfectionism may connect different miseries

The same account linked relentless standards and limited self-forgiveness to both anxiety and guilt, suggesting that forms of misery can reinforce one another.

These themes summarize a very small number of responses and are offered as observations, not general conclusions.